The Duvet Diaries – Neom’s “Perfect Night Sleep” gift box

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So I’ve decided that I won’t be going into the New Year hiding anymore. For those of you who thought that the introduction of “The Duvet Diaries” was an odd one, for me it was necessary.

I never wanted to write this post, since watching so many fellow bloggers be torn apart by people for opening up about it. But I’ve had to admit that it’s a huge part of my life now and I live every day with it. Seven months ago, right before took to the stand at BodyPower with my sponsors PhD Woman, I was given the blow that I’d been diagnosed with panic disorder. I now know that there are an alarming number of people who too suffer with it, not to mention bloggers. But when I was told, I knew of no one. I felt weak, alone and ashamed.

The months to follow were a haze of sleeping tablets, panic attacks and Cognitive Behavioural therapy. I think I could have coped with the panic but the panic only came at night which meant sleep was relatively impossible. In that time I lost friends, re-evaluated myself a lot and actually learned a lot about myself that I didn’t no; like I’m not invincible, who knew?!

Suddenly sleep became one of the most important factors in life I started meditating, adjusting my diet, adjusting my training and trying remedies to help in any way possible. As the months went on, although slow, the progress came and so did the knowledge that I am so far from alone in this. Although I still suffer with panic attacks, some which I’m able to explain and some which are completely random, I’m finally at a point where I felt ready to talk and hopefully share any knowledge, regardless of who negatively judged me because of it.

So I hope that explains a little more about how The Duvet Diaries came about and why a beautiful box from Neom with “Perfect Nights Sleep” written on the front would get me so excited.

My Grandma had told me about pillow mists a few months ago so I was over the moon to finally have my own, along side side a bath oil and candle to fill my evening with ultimate tranquility. I like to start an evening of pure relaxation by running a hot bath and lighting the Neom Tranquility candle candle, and soaking for as long as I feel necessary.

Once I finally peel myself from the bottom of the cooling bath I get myself ready for a little meditation, taking the melting candle with me. I’ve learned a lot of really helpful breathing patterns from Yoga recently which I really use during these times because that usually tends to be the first thing to go through the roof whilst my heart fights to break out of my chest. My favourite App at the moment to guide me through my meditation is definitely HeadSpace (which you can grab to download on the App store) and once I’ve regained control of my thoughts and breathing, I spritz a light mist of the Neom pillow spray which works in two ways for me, not only does the spell transport me to the Lavender fields of Provence but also gives my mind something to fully focus on.

This is a process I love to follow, as a panic disorder sufferer there are some episodes that I am yet to master the control of but focusing on and making time for relaxation has been such a huge part of my progress.

I already have a certain family member in mind who too deserves a little tranquility in their life this Christmas and I know exactly what I’ll be getting them.


“Perfect Night Sleep” Gift Box – c/o Neom



  1. Jen Flower 2nd December 2014 / 5:33 pm

    Couldn’t be more proud to see someone i’ve looked up to for well over a year now be brave enough to post something like this. I also suffer with panic attacks, but mines related to food & your blog believe it or not, has motivated & encouraged me through many challenges. No one will judge you for honesty, and if they do.. well it just says more about them than it does you x

  2. Finja b. 2nd December 2014 / 5:42 pm

    Thank you for sharing something thats so personal.
    You seem to be such a strong woman.

  3. Donna 2nd December 2014 / 5:55 pm

    very brave Lydia, I was ashamed for a long time (about 9 yrs!) to tell anyone about my social anxiety, I’ve also had a few panic attacks so I know how you feel. When I first realised what was wrong, I also felt the same as you, but recently seeing/reading other peoples experiences with panic/anxiety its really helped me realise its nothing to be ashamed of. The only other bit of advice I can give (you might of already been told) is Just focus on the positive, I know its a lot easier said then done, but it works 🙂 all the best x

  4. Adrienne 2nd December 2014 / 7:43 pm

    This took incredible courage. Thank you for sharing what so many of us are going through. xo.

  5. Lisa 2nd December 2014 / 8:39 pm

    Hey girl,

    Thank you for sharing. I can completely appreciate the debilitating feelings that you must feel with this disorder. Good on you for going to CBT. I did it too and it saved me from the brink of a mental breakdown from lack of sleep. I hope your recovery is a fulfilling journey, and that you find that inner peace that us PD sufferers so desire and search for! You’re a brave girl for sharing and I’m sure many of us are grateful and feel that little bit less alone for reading it.

    Lisa xx

  6. The City post-it 2nd December 2014 / 9:06 pm

    Congratulations for writing about this Lydia, this must have taken you a lot of courage. You bring a whole new dimension to your work when you reveal personal information like this but well done for owning it x

  7. kate 3rd December 2014 / 2:36 am

    Anyone who judges you negatively for this is a complete and utter tool. You certainly aren’t alone in having panic attacks/ severe anxiety and I would think that you’ve helped quite a lot of people who are affected by this by writing about it. You’ve given some really brilliant advice. I’m glad to hear that you’ve made such great progress and wish you all the best as you continue conquering this Xx

  8. Michelle 3rd December 2014 / 4:36 am

    To make it through what you have been through and to find ways to cope with and conquer your panic disorder makes you invincible. You are moving forward and not letting panic hold you down you are a strong woman. I had my first panic attack a few years back and it came on out of the blue at night and I honestly thought I was dying I woke my husband to hug him thinking it could be the last chance I had. I researched what my symptoms were and self-diagnosed and am not on medication(yet) since have had a few more attacks and I have just tried to really control my breathing and thoughts and I have also noted a similarity in a couple of attacks that I have had too many coffees that day so now I try to limit these as well. (This is just my personal observation and I am not in the medical field at all). I am going to look into the Headspace app thanks and best wishes for continued strength.

  9. Jennifer 3rd December 2014 / 10:07 am

    I’m sure I won’t be the only person guilty of assuming your life was so perfect (not that it isn’t by any means). It’s refreshing to see such a genuine blog post, one that isn’t asking for sympathy, but for understanding. When you see someone on a screen, it’s hard to imagine that they have struggles like everyone else and in a way it is good to remind everyone that we are all human. Everyone has things that they maybe don’t love about themselves. We shouldn’t be ashamed for people to find out who we really are.
    Honestly Lydia, Thank you for this.
    Jennifer Rebecca

  10. Janine Brown 4th December 2014 / 7:13 pm

    So amazing for you to talk about your panic disorder. SO many people have it, myself included. It’s such a hard experience to go through but I promise you once you face it and accept it, you will learn so much about your self and be that much stronger than the other people around you who try to bury their emotions and what not because you are more in tune with your self and learn so much about what triggers your panics and you become more open minded to a lot of things that you never did before.

  11. melissa konya 5th December 2014 / 4:04 pm

    Hi Lydia-
    I am a therapist in training over in the states. Always keep your hope alive, and know that you can conquer anything. And if people are not there for you, then you obviously dont need themin your life. Change your thoughts, change your life. That is my fav quote.I think maybe you could enjoy it too.
    <3 Melissa

  12. Lauren 26th December 2014 / 12:24 am

    Hey Lydia

    Brave of you to write this post, I posted something similar a few months ago, but felt I couldn’t be this open.

    I too have panic disorder, I was diagnosed at 17 (I’m now 25), but had been suffering since the age of 13. I’ve tried every alternative therapy, CBT & Medication – if you ever need someone to talk to, get in touch.

    Lauren x

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