There's been so much change in there air recently, perhaps it's due to the sudden shift in season or sometimes it can be as simple as, the time has come.
I'm not the kind of person to stay in the same spot for too long whether that's metaphorically speaking or not. I've spent the last eight months adjusting to our new life in the countryside as husband and wife. Settling in, making our house a home and whilst we are still a fair way off being finished, I've also spent the Summer working on myself. Autumn seemed like the perfect transition to talk about everything I learnt and the changes I made.
"I didn't choose the gluten free life, the gluten free life chose me...unfortunately."
TAKING MY DIET SERIOUSLY
I honestly never imagined I would be writing about my love of carbohydrates in a blog post but hey, here we are, although, what a fabulous subject this is. I love pasta, I love bread and I love everything that unfortunately makes me feel horrendous. I'd spent a good part of my life enjoying those very things, without a second thought. But from experience, when you live in a constant state of discomfort, you rarely remember what life was like without it. I'd enjoy my food and then spend the rest of the day, night and week feeling awful. This wasn't a type of guilt for eating what I enjoyed, growing up in an Italian family, food is to be enjoyed and nothing else. But my stomach would hurt, I'd even struggle to breathe through the bloating and the sluggish feeling could last days, and yet I never put two and two together. I'd reached that point where I truly believed it was normal to always feel this way after I ate, and in short, it just isn't.
I'd heard rumours that cutting things out of your diet only made things worse but it was time to take matters in to my own hands. I was breaking up with bread. Yes, Bread and pasta and pizza and all the soft doughy loveliness in-between. Something I never thought I would ever be able to do.
I'd pick bread over absolutely anything. I'm not mad about chocolate or sweets, cakes or pastries but bread, warm crusty bread, was my vice.
To put it bluntly, I didn't choose the gluten free life, the gluten free life chose me...unfortunately. I remember one hungover Sunday I ate a gluten free chip buttie and it was EPIC. However, we ran out of gluten free bread and with a house full of painters and workmen, we my husband had no choice but to head out for a fresh loaf. We he came back with a loaf of gluten free and a loaf of fresh, soft doughy, beige beautiful stuff. I couldn't resist and do you know what I learnt from my inability to resist? It. Isn't. Worth. It.
So I changed, I changed my attitude. I wasn't "depriving" myself of normal bread anymore, I was gifting myself the feeling of comfort, the ability to enjoy food without pain and if anything, just the knowledge that I do actually possess at least some self con-bloody-trol.
It all started with testing it out, I'd go a week, I thought. Because I didn't want to make it worse like everyone said it would get. And do you know why it gets worse, because cutting it out highlights just how bad it makes you feel. Before long I was actually opting for gluten free options in the supermarket, and trust me no-one on the face of the earth opts for those options unless they have to. Then I was making myself gluten free meals and before long I was living Monday-Friday practically gluten free. Issues only arose at weekends or when I travelled with work, I'd get caught up in my relaxation and fill my boots with whatever I fancied. I'd curse myself within minutes for being such a push over but sure enough I'm now making it through the weekends too and boy, does it feel good to enjoy meal times again.
I've said no quite a lot this year, I've said no when I probably should have said yes and that is a bitter pill to swallow. In all honesty, although I know I probably needed the time, I feel like I missed out on a lot of things I would have truly enjoyed. Hindsight is a wonderful thing and I won't be spending too long beating myself up over it because I plan on rectifying the situation by saying yes a hell of a lot more from this moment forth.
When I left university I didn't really have a solid base for a long time and naturally you want what you can't have, so when I finally had it, I clung on to it and wouldn't let it go. That, teamed with this overwhelming need to protect my cats as if they were made of porcelain (yes I said cats, not children) et voila, you say no to a lot of stuff.
So basically, I'm saying yes to stuff. Trips, holidays, nights with friends, spontaneous days out, events and more. I want to take advantage of the opportunities, I'm so fortunate to be offered so I'm raising my glass on this cold and wet Saturday night, to saying yes a lot more.
TRUSTING MY GUT
Man! have I spent a lot of time doubting my intuition these last few years. That feeling you get or that question you ask yourself in your head is. not. a. bloody. drill! Is this a good idea? Is he really the man for me? Is £500 on a pair of Loubs that you can't actually walk in, really a good idea? Lydia, girl, you know the answer to these questions and you should be listening to yourself, loud and clear. Don't let the fear of upsetting people discourage you from what you know, stand your ground, trust your gut and for goodness sake put the Louboutins back on the shelf.
EMBRACED LIFES NORMALITIES
There have been so many issues highlighted over the last year within Blogging, where content has walked the line of real and fake. What started out as being our "highlight reel" has quickly morphed into a fantasy life for some. No doubt as you become more and more creative with your content, pushing the boundaries further, it can be easy to lose sight of your authenticity and before you know it, you've gone too far.
As blogging and content creating has grown in popularity the audience has extended further into the mainstream media realm and with this comes conflicting expectations making it hard to always show the realities of life, despite filming it most days. I've been on the receiving end of a number of backlashes for simply talking about the realities of my life, and whilst it isn't easy to take , I intend to keep sharing the not so perfect times regardless and I hope that more of the industry follow suit so that normal life is depicted accurately.
What lessons did you learn this Summer? How are you taking those lessons into autumn with you? let me know in the comments below, I love hearing about your experiences.